Faking My Own Suicide
by packersgirl37
Summary: Oliver's tired of hiding how he feels for Lilly. So he does the most ridiculous thinghe pretends to commit suicide. Based off the song, Faking My Own Suicide by Relient K. LOLIVER! as always. now complete!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hannah Montana. Or Relient K, though if I did, I would be the owner of the most awesome band ever!**

Oliver was tired. Tired of keeping everything in. Tired of dropping hints,

only to have them be ignored and misunderstood. Tired of standing back

and watching as guy after guy hurt her. Hiding his true feelings only

worsened things and prolonged his agony. Ignoring them didn't work at all;

they always came back even stronger than before and made it impossible to

forget.

So, he only had one choice, and that was to somehow tell her how he

felt about her. He had kept his secret for years, and what had that gotten

him? An aching heart and countless times of wondering if she liked him

back. No, this was the only solution to his problem. Now, if only he could

figure out how he was going to do it . . .

Late that night, Oliver lay on his bed, trying desperately to come up

with a way to tell Lilly that he loved her. If he could just find out how she

felt first, it would be a whole lot easier for him, but he knew that the odds of

that happening were a million to one. Lilly hardly showed her true feelings

to anyone. But there had to be a way. Oliver sighed in frustration and

grabbed his iPod. It was always easier for him to think when he was

listening to music. He put it on shuffle and closed his eyes, barely noticing

that the song that had been picked was "Faking My Own Suicide" by Relient

K. Subconsciously, he began to sing along.

_So I've made up my mind  
_

_I will pretend  
_

_To leave this world behind  
_

_And in the end  
_

_You'll know I've lied  
_

_To get your attention  
_

_I'm faking my own suicide_

_I'm faking my own suicide  
_

_Because I know you love me  
_

_You just haven't realized  
_

_I'm faking my own suicide  
_

_They'll hold a double funeral  
_

_Because a part of you will die  
_

_Along with me_

_Wish you thought that I was dead  
_

_So rather than me  
_

_You'd be depressed instead  
_

_And before arriving at my grave  
_

_You'd come to the conclusion  
_

_You've loved me all your days  
_

_But it's too late  
_

_Too late for you to say_

_Because I'm faking my own suicide  
_

_Because I know you love me  
_

_You just haven't realized  
_

_I'm faking my own suicide  
_

_They'll hold a double funeral  
_

_Because a part of you will die  
_

_Along with me_

_I'll write you a letter that  
_

_You'll keep  
_

_Reminding you your love for me  
_

_Is more than six feet deep  
_

_You say aloud that you  
_

_Would've been my wife  
_

_Right about that time  
_

_Is when I come back to life  
_

_And let you know  
_

_I'd let you know (whooaa)_

_I was faking my own suicide  
_

_Because I know you loved me  
_

_You just never realized  
_

_I was faking my own suicide  
_

_I'll walk in that room and  
_

_See your eyes open so wide  
_

_I've been so lost  
_

_Because you know  
_

_Because you know  
_

_You will never leave my sight (you will never leave my sight)  
_

_Until the day that I die for the first time (until I die for the first time)  
_

_And we'll laugh, yeah we'll laugh  
_

_And we will cry  
_

_So overjoyed with the love  
_

_That saved my life  
_

_Our love is so alive_

About halfway through the song, Oliver's eyes shot open. He quickly

restarted it and really listened to the lyrics. His hands shook as he realized

that there, in that random song, was the answer to his problem. Sure, it was

risky, ridiculous, and could end up being a complete disaster. But he didn't

know what else to do; he was desperate. That night, he stayed up until three

in the morning, trying to figure out who to convince first to help him out.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey, everyone. Sorry that this is so short. I've had a terrible case of writer's cramp. The next chapter will be longer. Thanks for all the reviews! Please keep it up!**

He woke up the next morning feeling as if a thousand-pound meteorite had just

been lifted off of his back. Remembering that it was a Saturday, Oliver was about to

continue his usual weekend routine of sleeping until noon, when he remembered what

had happened the previous night. He shoved himself out of bed, threw on whatever

clothes were most accessible, and turned on his computer. As he clicked on the AIM

icon and waited for the window to pop up, he prayed that Miley was logged on. _Yes!_

Oliver smiled triumphantly as he saw that she was on. He hurriedly sent her an IM.

**Smokin'Oken:** Hey, Miley.

**SmileyMiley:** Oh, hi, Oliver. I didn't think you'd be awake.

**Smokin'Oken:** Yeah, well, I need to talk to you.

**SmileyMiley:** Ok. Shoot.

**Smokin'Oken:** I need help.

**SmileyMiley:** Well, it's about time you realized it.

**Smokin'Oken:** No, not like that. Relationship help.

**SmileyMiley:** Oh, boy. What is it now?

**Smokin'Oken:** I'm going to commit suicide.

**SmileyMiley:** Ok, first, what does that have to do w/ relationships, and second, HAVE

YOU LOST YOUR MIND?!

**Smokin'Oken: **No, I'm going to pretend to commit suicide. So that Lilly will realize

that I love her.

**SmileyMiley:** Stop speaking Chinese, donut boy.

**Smokin'Oken:** Look, listen to "faking my own suicide" by relient k. It should explain

everything.

**SmileyMiley:** Ok. w/e.

Since he knew she would be listening to the song, Oliver went downstairs and had

breakfast. When he came back up, there was a single unread message.

**SmileyMiley:** Meet me at Rico's in 20 minutes.

Oliver smiled and looked at his watch. If he left now on foot, he could get there

with a couple minutes to spare. But, if he took his skateboard, he could get there a lot

faster and have about ten minutes extra. Looking at his beckoning bed, he chose the

latter, and decided to use the extra time for a few more minutes of sleep. After all, he

was a guy, right?


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey, guys! Here's the next chapter. Thanks for the reviews. And I GREATLY appreciate any ideas you have. **

Miley sat at the table near Rico's, waiting. She still thought that Oliver was crazy

after she listened to the song, but she had been trying to get him and Lilly together for

years, so who was she to complain? Besides, there was a chance that it could actually

work.

Her thoughts were interrupted as Oliver meekly walked up, carrying his

skateboard, and sat down next to her.

"Did you hear the song?" he asked.

"Yep," Miley sighed. "So, just how are you going to pull this thing off?"

Oliver cleared his throat and shifted in his seat, knowing what her reaction would

be when he told her.

"Uh, well . . . I haven't really got that far yet," he admitted.

"WHAT?!" exclaimed Miley. "You mean that you haven't even come up with a

plan yet?"

He shook his head.

"I was kind of hoping that you would help with that. You _are_ pretty good at

coming up with things like this."

She glared at him, even though she knew he was right. Man, she hated it when

guys were right.

"So . . ." Oliver mumbled. "Do you have any ideas?"

"I'm not some stupid vending machine where you drop in some change, and

_viola!_ Out comes an idea! I need time."

"Well, could you hurry it up, 'cos I can't wait that long . . ."

Oliver saw the enraged look on Miley's face and stated, "I'll just shut up now."

_

* * *

This is hopeless,_ Miley thought. She had been racking her brains all day, and 

couldn't think of a single plan that didn't involve Oliver acting. Remembering the time

when she and Oliver acted out Romeo and Juliet, she decided that the less acting Oliver

did, the better. He couldn't even _die_ right, and inevitably, dying played a somewhat

major role in committing suicide. Miley groaned. Why hadn't he picked an easy way to

tell Lilly, like emailing her or giving her secret admirer notes? Searching for inspiration,

she picked up her iPod and found Oliver's song (aka faking my own suicide), which she

had downloaded earlier. This time, she really listened to the lyrics, and cleared her mind

of everything else. That's when it finally hit her. Lilly didn't actually have to see Oliver

commit suicide, she just had to believe that he did. Miley hurriedly picked up her cell

phone and dialed Oliver's number. She couldn't wait to tell him her idea.


	4. author's note

Author's Note

Hey, all you readers. I'm really sorry that I haven't updated sooner, but due to finals, the

holidays, and a HUGE case of writer's cramp, I couldn't come up with the next chapter.

But, never fear, because last night I was finally able to write it. So . . . here's chapter 4.

(Or is it chapter 5?)


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 (or is it chapter 5?)

Lilly sang at the top of her lungs as she listened on her iPod, completely oblivious

to everything around her. Sure, she sounded like a sick duck when she sang, and she

probably looked ridiculous as she played air guitar, but she didn't care. It wasn't like

anyone could see her in her room with the door locked.

Suddenly, there was a knock on her door, starling her. She realized that whoever

was out there had to have heard her off-key singing.

"Who is it?" she called out, hoping that it was Oliver. He was the only one who

she knew that she wouldn't have to be embarrassed around. He was just that way.

"It's me, Miley," the person behind the door answered.

Lilly gulped and rushed to unlock the door. She was taken back as she saw

Miley's stricken face.

"Miley, what's going on? Is something wrong?" she asked.

Miley looked down, knowing that what she was about to say would break Lilly's

heart.

"You'd better sit down," she slowly stated.

Still confused, Lilly did as she was told. Miley paced back and forth, trying to

make it seem like she was having trouble getting it out.

"Last night, there was an accident. Well, really, it wasn't an accident. It was on

purpose." Miley sighed, "Lilly, last night . . . Oliver killed himself."

Lilly sat there for a moment, then burst out laughing.

"You don't actually think that I'm going to believe that, do you?" she said

between bursts of laughter.

Miley did her best not to change her expression.

Seeing that Miley was serious, Lilly stopped laughing and questioned, "Wh-why

aren't you laughing?"

Her eyes grew wide.

"Y-you mean . . . he's . . . and," she stuttered.

Miley pulled a piece of paper out of her pocket and handed it to her best friend.

"This was all they found," she whispered. And with that, she left, knowing that

her job was done, at least, for now.

Lilly didn't move for a couple minutes, still in shock, but finally, she slowly

unfolded the crinkled piece of paper. She recognized Oliver's scrawled handwriting as

she read the words.

_I've always felt alone. All I ever wanted was for someone to love me. I just wanted _

_someone to say that they loved me. _

Lilly felt as if someone had stolen all the breath from her lungs. She was sure that

her heart had stopped beating when she read those soul-wrenching words.

_If only I had told him,_ she thought. _If I had just told him, this wouldn't have _

_happened. But now he's dead, and I could've prevented it from happening. It's my fault. _

_This is my fault. _

She fell to her knees, the paper still in her hand, and clutched her chest as she felt

everything in her explode. Her whole world, everything that she had ever truly cared

about, was falling apart. Not hearing or seeing anything, Lilly cried.

Miley walked to her house, where Oliver was waiting.

"Did you do it?" he eagerly asked. Miley smiled.

"Consider it done," she said.

Oliver sighed, and asked, "How did she take it?"

"Just like we hoped."


	6. Chapter 5

"Lilly!!" her mom called. "Time to get up!"

Groaning, Lilly sat up and rubbed her eyes. She looked at her alarm clock, which

read _11:13_. _How could I have slept so late_, she wondered. The blanket and sheets were

strewn all over her bed, which surprised her. She normally was a deep sleeper, and

therefore didn't move around much. Then it hit her, and she remembered the events of

the night before, including the nightmares. All through her dreams, she had seen Oliver's

lifeless form. Fighting a wave of depression, she stopped herself from going back to

sleep and went downstairs.

Her older brother, Gabe, and younger brother, Trent, sat watching TV as her

mom worked on the computer. Trent was the first to notice her.

"Dude, you look awful," he blurted out.

"What?" Lilly mumbled. She turned around to look at herself in the decorative

mirror on the wall and gasped. She _did_ look awful. Her hair was tousled, eye makeup

was smeared, and there were large bags underneath her eyes.

Her mom walked over to her and asked, "Are you alright, honey?"

"Y-yeah," Lilly stammered. "I had some bad dreams last night, that's all."

_At least I'm not lying, _she thought. Nodding, her mom left her alone as she ate

her breakfast and headed back upstairs to change. Lilly subconsciously put on some

clothes and headed outside towards the beach.

It took her a couple minutes to realize that someone was following her, but she

calmed down when she saw that it was only her brother, Gabe.

"What are you doing here?" she asked as soon as he had caught up with her.

He bluntly replied, "Do you really think that I'm going to believe that nightmare

story you fed Mom? What's really going on?"

Lilly turned away. "What makes you think that there's something wrong?"

Gabe smiled. "Because you're wearing the same clothes you wore yesterday."

Blushing, Lilly looked down and saw that she had put on the green hoodie and

camo pants that she had worn the day before. She defiantly looked up and retorted, "That

doesn't prove anything."

"Come on, Lil," he grinned. "You can't hide it forever. Sooner or later it's going

to come out. So why not make it be sooner?"

Sighing, she sat down on the sand. "You really want to know?" she asked.

Seeing that she was about to tell him what had been bugging her, Gabe sat down

next to her and waited. Closing her eyes, Lilly tried to force the words out of her mouth,

but her vocal chords wouldn't obey. Her brother still sat patiently waiting. Swallowing

back the lump in her throat, Lilly whispered almost inaudibly, "Oliver . . . killed himself

. . . two days ago."

When she looked up at her brother, he seemed genuinely shocked. **(a/n: emphasis **

**on "seemed")**. "Oh, Lil, I'm so sorry," he whispered. Lilly quickly wiped away the tear

that dared to slide down her face.

"It's okay. I'm okay," she said, trying to appear strong and in control. Pasting on

a smile, she stood and declared, "Well, I gotta go. See ya."

After Lilly had walked away, Gabe pulled out his cell phone and dialed Miley's

number. She answered, and said, "Hey, Gabe. Thanks for helping us out."

He smiled, and replied, "No problem. I've had to watch Lilly and Oliver my

whole life, waiting for them to get together. If this is what it takes, then just let me know

what else I need to do."

"Well, if Lilly starts doing anything drastic, or gets seriously depressed, could you

let me know? We're still not sure how far it's going to go before he tells her the truth."

"Sure. Bye," Gabe said, and walked home, feeling pretty satisfied with himself.

**Sorry if this chapter was a little slow. Review, please! **


	7. Chapter 6

Soon afterwards, Miley decided that it was time to enact the next part of her plan.

Well, actually, it was the only other part she had been able to come up with so far. But

she liked to believe that it was a work in progress. Not that she'd tell Oliver that, though.

After all, he was counting on her.

By bribing the class computer geek, who just happened to be an avid fan of a

certain blonde pop star, Miley got help hacking into the school's computer system. From

there, she got the email addresses of everyone in the 11th grade class **(a/n: sorry, I forgot **

**to mention that Miley, Lilly, and Oliver are now juniors)**, and went home, leaving the

nerd to admire his new, autographed life-size poster of Hannah Montana.

Once in the privacy of her own room, Miley logged onto her computer and was

about to begin typing, but she was interrupted by the sound of her cell phone's ringtone.

Seeing the caller id, she sighed, and said, "Great. Lover-boy himself." Still on the

computer, Miley answered the phone. "Hey, Oliver. What is it this time?" Deciding to

multitask, she began to type in the emails of all the juniors **(a/n: remember that—****all**** the **

**juniors)**, even though she was distracted by the call.

"Yes, I got the emails. Don't worry about it; I've got it under control. No, I don't

know where Lilly is."

Coming up with a quick excuse, she hurriedly said, "Look, Jackson's calling me

to pop some gross pimple on his back. Yeah, bye." _Oliver, you are such a donut,_ she

thought. Relieved to finally be left alone, she began to type up the message she had

previously written.

_Subject: To All 11__th__ Graders _

_Miley here. Despite whatever you may have against me, please do not delete this email _

_without reading it. This is extremely important. _

_I'm sure all of you know Oliver Oken (you may prefer the name "locker-man") _

_and Lilly Truscott. Well, unknown to Lilly, Oliver really likes her (big surprise!). Oliver _

_has decided to take the initiative (for once) and came up with this crazy, ridiculous, and _

_strange idea that he's using to find our if she likes him back and to tell her how he feels. _

_So, as of about three days ago, Oliver Oken killed himself. (Yes, Amber and Ashley, that _

_means that HE'S DEAD.) If you could just please humor him and act like he's dead, _

_especially around Lilly, it would be greatly appreciated. And, of course, if you want to _

_email Lilly or talk to her about it, saying that you're sorry, yada, yada . . . _

_No matter if you hate Oliver, Lilly, and/or me, PLEASE just do what I'm asking. _

_It will only work if everyone is involved. _

**The next day . . . **

Lilly desperately wanted to be left alone. She had gone to the beach looking for

Miley, and instead got approached by what seemed like the whole 11th grade, all wanting

to talk to her about Oliver. He was the last thing she wanted to talk about, let alone hear

about, and no one talked of anything else. The worst, though, had to be when Amber and

Ashley stopped by.

_"Oh, look, Amber, it's dorkette #2," Ashley taunted, calling Lilly by the nickname _

_they had given her. "But why is she so sad?" _

_"Ugh, Ashley, it's so obvious," Amber said, leaning very close to Lilly. Lilly _

_questioningly lifted an eyebrow. _

_With a cruel smile, Amber stated, "Her little lover-boy killed himself. And it's all _

_her fault." _

_Trying to mask the anger rising inside of her, Lilly gritted her teeth and _

_whispered, "What do you mean?" _

_"I think you know what I mean. Face it, Lilly. If it wasn't for you, he's still be _

_alive right now." Thoroughly satisfied with herself, Amber leaned back. _

_A sob escaped Lilly's throat, and she ran off the beach toward her house. _

Now, Lilly stumbled up the stairs of her home, and half ran, half fell into her

room. She quickly locked the door and reached for her iPod, wanting to block out

everything including her emotions. Not even glancing at the song, she pressed play and

lay back on her bed.

_Your life dreams are shattered_

_You're gone away_

_We've cried here for hours _

_And the hours turn to days _

_We know you regret this _

_Leaving us here_

_With portraits and memories that we've held so dear_

_Well I hear your name_

_It's not the same_

_No matter what they say_

_I'm not okay_

_And we're starting at zero _

_And went different ways_

_Now we're all out here wasting away_

_And if we started at zero_

_Then how did things change_

_Seems like just yesterday _

_We were the same_

_It's been three months since you left us_

_So far nothing's been the same_

_And my question without answer is:_

_Am I the one to blame?_

_He was such a good description_

_Of a favored future man_

_He spoke well of other people_

_And they said the same for him_

_Well I hear your name_

_It's not the same_

_No matter what they say_

_I'm not okay_

_And we started at zero _

_And went different ways _

_Now we're all out here wasting away_

_And if we started at zero_

_Then how did things change _

_Seems like just yesterday _

_We were the same _

_We were the same_

_We were the same_

The song only made her cry more. Curling into a fetal position, Lilly cried herself into a

troubled sleep.


	8. Chapter 7

**First of all, I would like to thank Spencer-Sweetie for giving me the idea of Lilly **

**being angry. Spencer-Sweetie, if it were not for that review, I never would have had **

**the train of thought that led to the plot of these last two chapters. Since all you **

**readers probably have no idea what I'm talking about, just read and you'll find out **

**what I'm rambling on about . . .**

**Also, if you don't believe in God, please do not get offended. I am not trying to **

**offend anyone, even thought it's what I believe. Just thought I'd mention that. **

She woke up a few hours later, her blanket and pillow stained with teardrops. The

darkness of her room and of the sky outside only seemed to add to the emptiness that she

felt inside. Lilly tried her best to block out the questions and thoughts that constantly

bombarded her, but it was no use.

_Why? Why, God? How could you let this happen to me? You knew. You were the _

_only one who knew that I loved him. And now, it's too late. Do you hate me? Do you _

_want me to live like this my whole life? _

_Stop it,_ she mentally chided herself. _Stop acting like such a baby. It's over and _

_done. Now get over him. _

_What if I don't want to get over him? _the other side of her brain argued. _Hello, I _

_lost my best friend and probably the only guy I'll ever love! _

_He's just a guy. You're such a pathetic loser. _

"Shut up!!" Lilly screamed, her hands covering her ears as if that would stop her

from hearing her own thoughts. "Stop it," she whispered, her breath coming in gasps.

Once again, trying to block her thoughts, she logged onto her computer and went to her

inbox. "53 messages?!" she nearly screamed. To her surprise and dismay, they seemed

to be from people in her classes at school, the very people who had wanted to talk to her

about Oliver. Deciding to ignore them, she was about to shut down the computer, when a

message labeled "To All 11th Graders" caught her eye. Lilly curiously opened it and

read:

_Miley here. Despite whatever you may have against me, please do not delete this email _

_without reading it. This is extremely important. _

_I'm sure all of you know Oliver Oken (you may prefer the name "locker-man") _

_and Lilly Truscott. Well, unknown to Lilly, Oliver really likes her (big surprise!). Oliver _

_has decided to take the initiative (for once) and came up with this crazy, ridiculous, and _

_strange idea that he's using to find our if she likes him back and to tell her how he feels. _

_So, as of about three days ago, Oliver Oken killed himself. (Yes, Amber and Ashley, that _

_means that HE'S DEAD.) If you could just please humor him and act like he's dead, _

_especially around Lilly, it would be greatly appreciated. And, of course, if you want to _

_email Lilly or talk to her about it, saying that you're sorry, yada, yada . . . _

_No matter if you hate Oliver, Lilly, and/or me, PLEASE just do what I'm asking. _

_It will only work if everyone is involved._

Lilly was dumbstruck. A torrent of feelings flooded inside her: disbelief, relief,

and embarrassment for being so gullible. But the most overwhelming of all was anger.

This time, she didn't ignore her thoughts and feelings, but let them take over.

Completely engrossed in her anger, Lilly walked to Oliver's house, even though it was

late.


	9. Chapter 8

Five minutes later . . .

Oliver walked into his darkened room, tired and frustrated. He had spent most of the day at the Stewart house, and even thought Miley was his friend, one could only take so much of her constant fighting with Jackson. Groping around in the dark, Oliver stumbled into his lamp and flipped the switch, flooding the room with light.

"Aahh!!" he screamed, leaping a foot into the air. There stood Lilly, with a cold and angry stare on her face.

"Hello, Oliver," she said, her calm voice almost masking the anger inside her.

Searching for words, Oliver stammered, "Lilly . . . I . . ."

"Just how long were you going to wait before you told me that you weren't dead?" she cut him off. "Did you honestly think that I wouldn't find out? Or did you even care that you were hurting me?!" Lilly shoved him onto his bed, her face now a picture of pure hatred. "How could you do something like this to me? What gave you the sadistic idea in the first place?"

Oliver meekly avoided her questions and said with a nervous smile, "How did you find out?" Her eyes burned holes into his.

She pointed at his laptop and whispered, "Why don't you check your email?"

Oliver's eyes widened in shock, and he slumped down even more. "I just . . . wanted you to like me," he stated, tears forming in his eyes.

Engrossed by her anger and not thinking of what she was saying, Lilly blurted out, "I loved you!"

Shocked, Oliver stood up, and half-yelled back, "Then why didn't you say anything?"

"Why should I have to say something?!"

"Well, if you had, we wouldn't be in this situation!"

"YOU'D BETTER NOT BE SAYING THIS IS MY FAULT!!" Lilly bellowed.

Teeth clenched, Oliver declared, "Well, maybe. I . Am."

"This is your fault. I didn't pretend to be dead for four days."

Despite how much he wanted to kiss her, Oliver said, "You know, maybe you should go."

With a final glare, Lilly stormed out of his room and ran to her house. Once she had left, Oliver broke down and began to cry. He didn't care about being manly if he had lost the girl he loved.


	10. Chapter 9

**Hey. Sorry that it's taken me so long to update, but I was . . . ahem (cough) grounded. This chapter is mostly a ****songfic****. Sorry again that some of the lines of the song don't exactly fit. **

Lilly sat on her bed once again, only this time she wasn't crying. The argument played over and over again in her mind, yet she couldn't see how what had happened had been partially her fault. She refused to see it. She was angry, and if anyone asked her whether she would talk to Oliver again, her immediate response would be no. However, her heart would whisper otherwise. Despite it all, past the emotions that had controlled her, she still loved him, though her stubborn pride kept her from apologizing.

_I think you know what I'm getting at_

_I find it so upsetting that_

_The memories that you select_

_You keep the bad but the good you just forget_

_And even though I'm angry I can still say_

_I know my heart will break the day_

_That you peel out and drive away_

_I can't believe this happened_

_And all this time I never thought_

_That all we had would be all for naught_

_No I don't hate you_

_Don't want to fight you_

_Know I'll always love you but right now I just don't like you_

_'Cause you took this too far, too far_

Oliver sat on the sand of the beach near his house, unsure of what to think and feel about what had just happened. Anger over what Lilly had said and sadness over losing her battled inside him. He couldn't believe how badly his plan (or really, Miley's) had failed. He had pictured things differently in his head when he had thought of how Lilly would react to the truth. He didn't think she would be angry and blame him.

_Make your decision and don't you dare think twice_

_Go with your instincts along with some bad advice_

_This didn't turn out the way I thought it would at all_

_You're blaming me, but some of this is still your fault_

_I tried to move you, but you just wouldn't budge_

_I tried to hold your hand, but you'd rather hold your grudge_

_I think you know what I'm getting at_

_You said goodbye and I just don't want you regretting that_

_No I don't hate you_

_Don't want to fight you_

_Know I'll always love you but right now I just don't like you_

_And wisdom always chooses_

_These black eyes and these bruises_

_Over the heartache that they say_

_Never completely goes away_

_No I don't hate you_

_Don't want to fight you_

_Know I'll always love you but right now I just don't like you_

_'Cause you took this too far_

_What happened to us?_

_I heard that it's me we should blame_

_What happened to us? _

_Why didn't you stop me from turning out this way?_

_And know that I don't hate you_

_And know that I don't want to fight you_

_And know I'll always love you_

_But right now I just don't _

**Once again, if anyone has any suggestions, I very willingly take them. Btw, the song is "Which to bury, us or the hatchet?" by ****Relient**** K. The other song that I forgot to name was "Zero" by Hawk Nelson. **


	11. Chapter 10

**Here is the next long-awaited chapter. Hope you guys like it! **

"Clase, sacen sus libros y miran a la pagina ciento ochenta y uno," Miley's Spanish teacher called out. Miley opened her textbook and stared blankly at the page, but her mind was elsewhere. How could she be expected to pay attention when her best friends' relationship was ruined possibly for forever? She still couldn't shake the feeling that it was her fault. After all, she had come up with the plan in the first place.

Miley glanced at Lilly and sighed. Ever since the fight with Oliver, Lilly kept to herself and avoided Miley and Oliver as much as humanly possible. Oliver wasn't much help either. He did everything as if in a trance, and wouldn't even touch a skateboard or surfboard. They only reminded him of Lilly.

"Miley!" Senora Thomas's voice broke through her thoughts. "Please translate number seven."

Frantically, Miley glanced at the problem and said weakly, "A mi me gusta comer la piscina?"

Her teacher raised an eyebrow and asked, "You like to eat the swimming pool?" Everyone but Lilly and Oliver laughed at her mistake. As Miley saw Lilly's expressionless face and Oliver's forlorn expression, she bit her lip and thought, _I've got to make things right. _

Lilly scowled as she opened her front door to find her best friend, no, her former best friend at her door. "What do you want?" she asked coldly.

"I need to talk to you," Miley said, and walked inside before Lilly could stop her.

Her jaw clenched, Lilly turned and declared, "You think that you can just walk in here and—"

"I'm sorry, Lilly. Okay? I'm really sorry," Miley interjected.

Lilly swallowed the lump forming in her throat and strangledly replied, "How could you do it?" Miley began to walk closer to Lilly.

"Because . . . I knew how much Oliver loved you." Lilly took a step backward, as if Miley had punched her.

"What?" she whispered.

"Come on, Lilly. He's loved you since kindergarten. Everyone knew it."

"What?" Lilly whispered again, as if she hadn't heard it.

Looking at Lilly's stricken face, Miley's eyes widened, and she said more to herself than to Lilly, "You really didn't know, did you?" Very slowly, Lilly shook her head, tears forming in her eyes. Thinking quickly, Miley backed out of the room and shut the door. Once she was alone, Lilly weakly sat on the couch. Did her ears deceive her?

Could he really . . . love her? She had known that he liked her, thanks to Miley's email . . . but love? That was an entirely different thing. When you loved someone, you would die for them. She would die for Oliver anyday. Would he do it for her?

_You know, he kind of already did_, her conscience chuckled. Lilly looked up.

"You're right," she whispered.

Suddenly, as if a meteorite had been taken off of her back after crushing her for years, she felt lighter. And for the first time in days, she knew exactly what to do.

**Sorry that it's so short. It seems like the more chapters I write, the shorter they get. Also, about the scene in Spanish class, that was more of ****a filler****, and I wanted to practice my Spanish. Are you wondering what Lilly will do next, or do you already know? Well, really only I know. If you know, then you must be a mind-reader or psychic. ****Sorry for rambling . . . **


	12. the end

Lilly quickly left a note for her mom, explaining where she was just in case her mom wondered where she had gone, then ran out of the house. The cloudless, sun-filled sky mirrored the joy she felt inside. It was as if all the pain and sadness that had been building up inside of her had been erased from her heart, leaving the freedom and happiness she had always craved for.

Reaching the crossroads that would lead her either to Oliver's house or to the beach, she stopped, panting. _Hmm_, she thought. _Where would a donut with relationship problems go?_ Turning around and looking in every possible direction, Lilly searched for his all-too-familiar, yet heart-melting face. Suddenly, a flash of shaggy brown hair heading for the beach caught her eye. She frantically gave chase, her heart pounding. She followed him all the way to Rico's Shack, never catching more than a glimpse of the back of his hair. Finally reaching Rico's, she spotted a flash of brown hair in the midst of a large crowd next to Rico's.

"Oliver!" she cried out, pushing through the throng of people.

The boy that she had been following spun around on the stool he had been sitting on and said in a sickeningly seductive voice, "Hola, mamasita."

"Aahh!!" Lilly screamed, realizing that the person she had been following was Rico himself. Still screaming, she ran as fast as she could away from Rico and the laughing crowd. Once she reached the waves, Lilly slowed and shuddered. _Rico._

"Lilly?" a weak voice behind her asked. Startled, Lilly spun around to see Oliver. He looked tired and seemed as if he had been crying. Her heart ached to see him like this, but she smiled nonetheless. However, for a while, neither of them knew what to say. Lilly racked her brain for how to put her feelings into words, and Oliver stood there, feeling helpless.

Finally, he cleared his throat and slowly said, "Lilly, I'm so sorry for what I did. I never meant to—" Lilly cut him off by throwing her arms around him and pressing her lips onto his. Surprised, Oliver didn't know how to react.

Lilly realized that he was in shock, and pulled away, saying, "I know. And I'm so sorry, too. And, Oliver . . . I love you."

Oliver didn't say anything. He didn't need to. He just simply kissed her back.

_I watched the proverbial sunrise _

_Coming up over the Pacific _

_And you might think I'm losing my mind_

_But I will shy away from the specifics_

_Cause__ I don't want you to know where I am_

_Cause then you'll see my heart in the saddest state it's ever been_

_This is no place to try and live my life_

_Stop right there _

_That's exactly where I lost it_

_See that line _

_Well I never should've crossed it_

_Stop right there _

_Well I never should've said that_

_It's the very moment that I wish that I could take back_

_I'm sorry for the person I became_

_I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change_

_I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again_

_Cause who I am hates who I've been_

_Who I am hates who I've been_

_I talked to absolutely no one_

_Couldn't keep to myself enough_

_And the things bottled inside had finally begun_

_To create so much pressure that I'd soon blow up_

_And I heard the reverberating footsteps _

_Syncing out to the beating of my heart_

_And I was positive that unless_

_I got myself together I would watch me fall apart _

_And I can't let that happen again _

_Cause then you'll see my heart in the saddest state it's ever been_

_This is no place to try and live my live_

_Stop right there_

_That's exactly where I lost it_

_See that line_

_I never should've crossed it_

_Stop right there_

_I never should've said that_

_It's the very moment that I wish that I could take back_

_Stop right there _

_That's exactly where I lost it_

_See that line _

_I never should've crossed it_

_Stop right there_

_I never should've said that_

_It's the very moment that I wish that I could take back_

_I'm sorry for the person I became _

_I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change_

_I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again_

_Cause who I am hates who I've been_

_Who I am hates who I've been_

_Who I am hates who I've been_

_And who I am will take the second chance you gave me_

_Who I am hates who I've been_

_Cause who I've been only ever made me _

**_The End!!_**


End file.
